Exploring Perspectives: Insights and Reflections

This week I did host the English Corner metting, and it was my third time discussing this topic, I did in Zhuzhou, Jiujiang and now here in Zhengzhou. it was about dating.

As I mentioned in previous posts, my status in China is always a topic of curiosity among the students. I have never hidden anything from them, so I have no problem sharing everything about my situation. I have been divorced for almost 10 years, even though I didn't want the divorce. Sometimes, I feel alone and so on, but I don't hesitate to discuss these things with my students.

On the other hand, I have also become curious about how things work in China, particularly the perspectives of the new generation regarding life, jobs, and relationships. This curiosity gave me an opportunity to ask them about their plans for the future. Surprisingly, I received more answers than I had expected saying marriage is not part of their plans. Many people, especially girls, expressed their lack of interest in getting married. They blamed the boys, claiming that they are not suitable for marriage.

Having been married and divorced myself, I understand how loneliness can be detrimental. Coming back to an empty home at the end of the day can be quite challenging. However, I try to focus my attention on my work and appreciate the adventure I am experiencing in China, which wouldn't have been possible if I were still married. So, overall, my life isn't that bad. Additionally, I am earning a good income. However, as I mentioned before and want to emphasize again, money alone doesn't bring happiness. It only makes life more comfortable, not necessarily happier.

I have attempted to highlight the advantages of getting married because I believe it can be a positive experience. I have witnessed the potential for happiness and personal growth through my parents' relationship. They stayed together for over 50 years until my father passed away last year.

My argument for marriage is that when it is done properly, it can lead to personal growth, maturity, and unimaginable happiness. I often refer to an experiment where people nearing the end of their lives were asked to answer a questionnaire about their lives. Not a single person stated that they wished they had spent more time working to make more money. Instead, they regretted not spending enough time with their loved ones (you can find that questionnaire in this post about dating).

Dating is a process that can lead to finding suitable partners for potential marriage. If the dating phase goes well, there is a good chance that marrying that person would work out. However, it is important to know what you are doing and pay attention to important aspects. If you date with the right intentions and considerations, the argument most students present for not wanting to get married would fall apart. It is possible to find good people with whom life would be better than staying alone.

Perhaps this is just my humble opinion, but in today's world with the internet, it is easy to find numerous women on social media who focused on their careers and remained single. Now, many of them regret that decision, especially since it is not as easy as it once was in their twenties to find a husband.

I am writing this post in the hope of providing a different perspective to those who disagree with me or are not considering marriage in their future. If they are wise, they will research this subject further to determine whether this is just someone's opinion or if there is some truth to it. It is crucial to consider all options before it becomes too late to change direction.

As a teacher, my main role is to teach students to think for themselves and make good decisions in life. Getting married is perhaps one of the most important decisions someone can make because it can have a profound impact on their life.

I hope this post prompts you to reflect, at least to some extent. Farewell for now.

You can watch it in YouTube or YouKu

PS: I have the recording of this week's English corner activity, where we delved into the topic of dating. It was an incredibly enjoyable and enlightening session. Not only was I able to share valuable insights and advice with the students, but I also learned a great deal from them. I absolutely adore these kinds of activities that allow me to spend quality time with students while engaging in such an awesome discussion.