Sunday, December 25, 2022

TIPS REPORT 28: SLOWING DOWN IN A FAST-PACED WORLD

 This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested readings for those who are looking for even more information. 


This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

We live in a fast-paced world that seems to be getting faster each year. While technology has helped us accomplish some things more efficiently, it certainly hasn't slowed our pace down. It's quite the opposite. Many people enjoy this fast-paced, action-packed world, but even the most ardent supporters could benefit from slowing down once in a while. It's not until we slow down that we can notice just how far we have come. If you think you would benefit from slowing down in life, consider these nine tips.

 

1. Slowing Down is a Choice

It would help if you acknowledged that slowing down is a choice. Recognizing this is important because it helps you realize that you don't have to bounce along at breakneck speed with the rest of the world. You have the control to step back and slow down. It's your choice to make.

 

2. Say "No" A Lot More

The best way to slow down is to say "no" more often. You don't always have to do that favor or take on extra responsibilities. If you don't have the time, don't be afraid to say no to other people's demands for your time.

 

3. Do Less

You can accomplish just as much as you currently are by doing less if you make sure you spend most of your active time on the things that matter most. Focus on the things in your life that you really need to do, and let go (or outsource) the rest.

 

4. Disconnect

Smartphones and wireless internet are both life-changing developments in our world. Of course, that doesn't mean you have to be using them 24 hours a day. Don't be afraid to put your phone or device down, and immerse yourself in the world directly in front of you.

 

5. Make More Time for Nature

Spending time in nature is one of the best ways to ground yourself. Not all of us have access to remote mountain trails, but even a stroll in your local park can do wonders. Regularly spending time in the great outdoors is a wonderful way to slow down.

 

6. Find Simple Pleasures

So many of us seem to spend our time mindlessly working while waiting for the big events in our life. Not everything you celebrate or enjoy needs to be a big event, though. Learn to take more pleasure in the small daily things. Don't choke back your coffee as fast as possible in the morning; sit down and truly savor it.

 

7. Focus on Your Breathing

When is the last time you just sat there and focused on your breathing? This might not seem groundbreaking, but it's a powerful activity that helps ground you at the moment. If you ever feel like things are racing and spinning around you out of your control, take some time to clear your mind and focus on your breathing.

 

8. Stick to Single-Tasking

Focusing on one task at a time is a great way to slow your pace down. Instead of rushing to finish multiple tasks, you can take your time and do one well. An added benefit is that single-tasking is often more efficient than multi-tasking anyways.

 

9. Who Are You Competing With?

What imaginary race are you running, and who are your competitors? So often, our fast pace is in response to us competing with a sibling, coworker, neighbor, or that guy we all hated in high school. If you commit to worrying less about other people and stop comparing yourself, you will naturally slow your pace.

 

FAST-ACTION STEPS

 

a) Practice saying no. The next time someone asks you to do something you don't have time for, say no. Don't worry about explaining why.

 

b) Audit your day. Take a day (or more) to track everything that you do. Which tasks are just time-wasters? Are there any that you could outsource?

 

c) Find more simple pleasures. Find a new hobby or pastime that you can regularly enjoy.

 

FURTHER READING

 

Affiliate links:

1. Slowing Down to the Speed of Life

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2. The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry

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3. A Better Life: Slowing Down to Get Ahead

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4. Take Your Time: The Wisdom of Slowing Down

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5. Present, Not Perfect: A Journal for Slowing Down

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Sunday, December 18, 2022

TIPS REPORT 27: EVERYDAY DISTRACTIONS THAT HOLD US BACK

 This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested readings for those who are looking for even more information. 


This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement . If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

Distractions are a part of all our lives. While we can't avoid them all, how well we deal with them, in general, is often a key indicator of our success. While distractions are often different for each of us, some common distractions tie us all together. These everyday distractions don't just impact our focus; they can sap our energy as well. Below are nine different distractions that we should all try to avoid.

 

1. Social Media

Social Media has become a part of most of our lives. While it isn't all bad, it is certainly a distraction for many. How often have you checked social media quickly, only to end up scrolling for an hour? On top of that, it has a way of making us feel like we aren't living up to other's expectations.

 

2. Regrets

How often do you find yourself looking back at something with regret? Do you ever wish you had made a major decision differently? Maybe it's something simpler like wishing you had a snappier comeback in your last argument. Regardless of the severity, wasting time worrying about the past isn't helping you move forward.

 

3. Grudges

While you may have very good reasons for the grudges you hold, they are still an energy-wasting distraction. A grudge is just engaging your negative thinking. It's hard to focus when you are too worried about what someone did to you in the past. If they did something truly unforgettable, the best revenge you can get is to forget about them altogether.

 

4. Toxic Relationships

There is almost nothing more distracting in life than spending time with toxic people. These people not only try to monopolize your time, but they also make you feel horrible. If you have a one-sided toxic relationship in your life, consider cutting ties so you can focus fully on your goals.

 

5. Pursuit of Perfection

The idea of perfection is a dangerous distraction. When you pursue perfection, you might not feel distracted since you are still working towards something. The problem is, you are working towards something that does not exist (perfection). This pointless pursuit is distracting you from moving on and focusing on more important goals.

 

6. The Thoughts of Others

Why are we so bothered by what other people think? So often, we change our behavior because we are worried about what other people will think. Constantly worrying about other people is unbelievably distracting. You can't focus on what you want to do when you are too worried about what random people think.

 

7. Poor Boundaries

If you aren't setting proper boundaries with people, you are assuredly going to be distracted. When you don't set proper boundaries, people will have no problem infringing on your time and energy. Learn when and how to say "no" more often.

 

8. The Promise of Tomorrow

Having goals and a plan for the future is a powerful step towards success. However, getting lost in the promise of tomorrow can have the opposite effect. If you are too focused on the future, you will be distracted from everything happening right now. Plan for the future, but stay in the present.

 

9. Negative Thinking

Negative thoughts might be the most toxic distraction of all. When you engage in negative thinking, you are wasting both time and energy. Negative thinking will distract you from all the positive things happening in your life. If you catch yourself constantly thinking negatively, you need to find a way to change that.

 

FAST-ACTION STEPS

 

a) Brainstorm a list of all of your distractions. Take 15 minutes or so to list all of the distractions in your life that come to mind.

 

b) Track your distractions. You probably won't be able to remember all of your distractions, so keep a notebook handy and jot down any other distractions as they happen.

 

c) Choose the distraction(s) that affect you the most and develop a plan to overcome them.

 

FURTHER READING

 

Affiliate links:

1. Your Brain at Work: Strategies for Overcoming Distraction

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2.Driven to Distraction: Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder from Childhood Through Adulthood

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3. Indistractable: How to Control Your Attention

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5. Summary & Analysis of Hyperfocus: How to Be More Productive in a World of Distraction

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Sunday, December 11, 2022

TIPS REPORT 26: DEVELOP CLOSER RELATIONSHIPS

 This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested readings for those who are looking for even more information. 


This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

One of the keys to a happy life is having fulfilling relationships. You want to surround yourself with a close circle of people who inspire you to be a better version of yourself. If you struggle to create close relationships, you aren't alone. Many of us have plenty of acquaintances, but we don't know how to let our guard down and develop these closer and more fulfilling relationships. If this sounds like you, consider embracing the tips below.

 

1. Learn to Accept Imperfection

Perfection is a myth. You can't expect that all of your relationships will be perfect. It would help if you accepted that there will be ups and downs. Realizing that no one is perfect will help keep your relationship expectations in check.

 

2. CARPP

Consistency, availability, reliability, responsiveness, and predictability. These are the five elements that Dr. Amir Levine (psychiatrist) has identified as the foundational elements of a secure relationship.

 

3. You Have to Show Up

If you want to become closer to someone, you need to show up. Some of us struggle with social situations, but we should still strive to show up to important events in our loved ones' lives. This means the good AND the bad. You can't just show up to celebrate; sometimes, you need to show up to help or support as well.

 

4. Become a Better Listener

Do you really listen to your friends, or are you just waiting for a chance to jump in ad speak your piece? If you want a closer relationship, try listening to your friends more. You want to hear what they are saying and show you understand with either your body language or following up with thoughtful questions. You never know what you might learn.

 

5. Show a Genuine Interest

Being a better listener isn't enough on its own. You also need to show genuine, sincere interest in the other person. You should be excited when they are excited about something. You should genuinely enjoy spending time with them and not be afraid to show it.

 

6. Relationships Require Trust

Trust is paramount to any relationship. It is also a two-way street. You need to trust your closest friends, and they need to be able to trust you. If trust is ever broken, you need to take real steps (not just saying sorry) to fix it, or else a close relationship will never develop.

 

7. Let Them Know You

Letting your guard down can be tough for some people, but it's hard to have a close relationship unless you do it. The more you let people into your life and allow them to know the real you, the closer your relationship will be.

 

8. Talk Through Your Differences

Communication is another key aspect of any healthy relationship. You need to be able to talk about things, even the tough subjects. Being able to disagree respectfully is vital. Being able to give and take feedback is just as important.

 

9. Respect Their Boundaries

A close relationship doesn't necessarily mean physically close. It also doesn't mean you take up all of each other's time. A healthy relationship includes time apart and healthy boundaries. You can't be a true friend if you don't respect other people's boundaries.

 

FAST-ACTION STEPS

 

a) Reflect on your relationships. Do you feel fulfilled? Which relationships are most important to you?

 

b) Which relationships do you want to develop? Try to pinpoint a person or two that you'd like a closer connection with.

 

c) All that is left to do is act. Please choose one of the above tips, and put it into action today.

 

FURTHER READING

 

Affiliate links:

1. I Hear You: The Surprisingly Simple Skill Behind Extraordinary Relationships:

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2. The Relationship Cure

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4. Work Better Together: How to Cultivate Strong Relationships

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5. The Art of Showing Up: How to Be There for Yourself and Your People

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Sunday, December 4, 2022

TIPS REPORT 25: LEARN ANYTHING FASTER

 This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested readings for those who are looking for even more information. 


This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

While stress is a normal part of our lives, we have recently become more aware of its negative effects. Long story short, it isn't great. We should all strive to reduce stress where we can. One unique form of stress is deadline stress. This is the stress you feel when you are worried about deadlines that are hanging over your head. The Germans even have a word for this: Torschlusspanik. This word roughly translates to "fear of time running out." Does that sound like something you deal with? If so, consider using these nine tips to help overcome deadline stress.

 

1. Set More Realistic Deadlines

People tend to be overly optimistic when they initially set deadlines. While this is a hard habit to break, you need to get more realistic. Setting deadlines that aren't reasonable is only going to add to your stress. Make sure you set realistic deadlines that you can meet.

 

2. Make a Plan

Do you know how you are going to meet your deadline? Do you have a plan? If not, do this as soon as possible. Taking the time to outline a rough plan will likely reduce a lot of the deadline stress you are feeling.

 

3. Tidy Up Your Workspace

A cluttered workspace leads to a cluttered mind. Even if you feel stressed for time, it's important to take some time to tidy up your work area. A tidy work area means you have fewer distractions and will find it easier to focus on your most important deadlines.

 

4. Focus on Things You Can Control

You can't control every circumstance in your life. When you are facing a tough deadline, focus on the things you can control. Maybe your boss set the deadline so you can't control that, but you can control how you spend the time you have.

 

5. Break Down Intimidating Tasks

One of the best ways to deal with deadline stress is to break your intimidating tasks down into smaller action items. Instead of worrying about a huge task due in X amount of days, you can focus on smaller steps that you can do right away. The more of these steps you tackle, the closer you will be to your goal.

 

6. Prioritize What's Most Important

You should always be spending the majority of your time on your most important tasks. If you need help figuring out what you should be working on next, consider both urgency and importance. Important tasks move you towards your goals the most, and urgent tasks have the tightest deadlines. Find the sweet spot between those two tasks to figure out what deserves priority.

 

7. Focus on Your Inner Peace

Deadline stress is like all other types of stress in that you have to find ways to lower it. Focusing on your self-care and inner peace is the best way to do that. Consider taking up a meditation routine. Strive to be more mindful in your everyday life. Find hobbies and routines that naturally reduce your stress.

 

8. Let Go of Perfection

Perfection is the biggest enemy of "done." If you are already stressed about meeting a deadline, it doesn't make sense to add the stress of perfection. The reality is, perfect doesn't exist. If you keep nitpicking every little detail, you are only going to miss more deadlines. Don't invite the stress of perfection into your life.

 

9. Take a Break

If you are heads-down, working your tail off to meet a deadline, taking a break might be the last thing on your mind. This can be a dangerous mindset. Taking a break is a great way to re-energize and refocus to always give maximum effort. It is also a chance to step back from the details and take an overall look at your progress.

 

FAST-ACTION STEPS

 

a) Look at your schedule or calendar and take stock of your current deadlines. If you have projects or tasks without a deadline, give them one.

 

b) Examine all of your deadlines. Are there any deadlines you can move? Is there a deadline you were too aggressive on? Tweak your deadlines where necessary and possible.

 

c) Do any of the deadlines worry you? If you can't change a deadline that worries you, create a plan of attack to reach it. Figure out a step you can take towards it right now, and do it!

 

FURTHER READING

 

Affiliate links:

1. Little Book of Mindfulness

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2. One Year to an Organized Work Life

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