TIPS REPORT 34: COMMON CHALLENGES WE ALL FACE

This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested readings for those who are looking for even more information. 

This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

Each one of us takes a unique journey in life. No one's life experience is the same as someone else. That isn't to say there isn't any commonality at all, though. At one time or another, most of us face the same major challenges in life. It's quite possible that our response to those challenges will shape our entire life. How will you respond to these nine common challenges most of us face?

 

1. Loss of a Loved One

A loved one passing away is something none of us can escape. At some point - and often multiple points - in our lives, we lose someone we love. It is easy to get lost in grief, but our loved ones would want us to live on healthy and happy.

 

2. The Opinions of Others

While it would certainly be nice to escape the option of others, good luck getting through life without dealing with it. Whether it is friends, family, or random strangers, people will have an opinion on how you are living your life. The key is to know your core values and stick to them no matter what other people think.

 

3. Rejection

It would be shocking if you coasted through life without the bitter sting of rejection. You might not get into your first-choice college or land that dream job. You could be into someone who isn't into you. Regardless of the type of rejection, learning to bounce back better than ever should be your goal.

 

4. Career Change

Some people are lucky enough to finish school and go into a job that carries them to retirement. While that sounds nice, it is far from the norm these days. Most of us will have to go through some career change. No matter if you change your career entirely or just switch places of employment, dealing with this upheaval will be vital to your long-term success

 

5. Figuring Out Who We Are

Sometimes it takes a long time for us to figure out who we are. We spend our entire youth trying to pinpoint it. What makes me tick? What do I believe in? What do you I want? These seem like simple questions, but humans have been struggling to answer them for ages.

 

6. Overcoming Your Past

We all have a past to reckon with. This past may not include any serious trauma or skeletons in the closet, but we still all have our regrets and bad decisions. Reflecting on the past is good, but we can't keep living there. Being able to move beyond this past is an important part of all of our experiences.

 

7. Relationships Ending

There are a lot of stories of high school sweethearts living their lives happily ever after. For the vast majority of us, though, we will likely go through a few (or more!) relationships before we find our person. The end of a relationship can be a massive upheaval, so take time to grieve it. Eventually, though, you need to get up, brush yourself off and put yourself out there again.

 

8. Health Issues

Life can come at you very fast if you suffer a serious health issue. Even a less serious health issue could change the way you live your daily life. No matter the severity, most of us will have to deal with some sort of medical issue. Keeping a positive outlook will be a huge boost to your recovery.

 

9. Failure

Good luck trying to get through life without failing at something. The reality is that all of us will fail at some point, which is a good thing. Failure is one of the best lessons we will ever learn. You learn a lot about yourself in the face of failure. How you choose to react to failure will shape your entire life.

 

FAST-ACTION STEPS

 

a) What challenges have you already faced? What did you learn? How did you get through them?

 

b) Consider the common challenges we all face. Which one do you fear the most?

 

c) Address your fear by creating a plan on how you will deal with this future challenge.

 

FURTHER READING

 

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TIPS REPORT 33: HABITS OF LIKABLE PEOPLE

 This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested readings for those who are looking for even more information. 

This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

Don't you hate those people who everyone likes? Actually, you probably don't! Some people have this ability to skate through life, beloved by everyone. They find it easy to make friends and rarely ruffle anyone's feathers. You might want to hate them, but you simply can't. If you would like to learn more about the habits of likable people, keep reading.

 

1. They Are Genuine

Likable people are honest. You can't be likable if you are constantly lying, it will catch up to you eventually. Likable people are also genuinely themselves. They don't act like anyone else; they are happy with who they are.

 

2. They Give Freely

You don't have to give away everything you own to be likable, but being willing to give without receiving anything in return is a key trait of a likable person. Giving isn't limited to money and gifts though, likable people are also willing to give their time.

 

3. They Let Others Shine

It feels good to be recognized for something that you have accomplished. Likable people will allow you to bask in that glory. They are happy to see you get rewarded and don't hold any jealousy about it.

 

4. They Ask Thoughtful Questions

It is often said that we should listen two times as much as we speak. Likable people take this a step further. They don't just listen, though; they follow up with thoughtful questions that prove they are actually interested in what you have to say.

 

5. They Are Positive

It is much more enjoyable to spend time with positive people. They might not be over the top happy at all times, but likable people tend to think and act positively. They will always find the silver lining when you are feeling down in the dumps.

 

6. They Don't Pass Judgement

Likable people tend to be less judgmental than the rest of us. If they do judge someone, they will do it silently. They believe in "live and let live" as long as your actions aren't directly harming them or the people around them.

 

7. They Are Humble

There are few things worse than spending time in the company of a braggart. While it is perfectly fine to be proud of your accomplishments, talking about them all the time is a bore. Likable people certainly have accomplishments they are proud of, but they would rather you ask about them first.

 

8. They Take Responsibility

No one is perfect; we all make mistakes at one point or another. Likable people are no different; they make mistakes, too - sometimes major ones. The difference is they take responsibility. They acknowledge they did wrong, apologize and then let you know how they plan to make sure it never happens again.

 

9. They Are Patient

Likable people are often more patient than others. They don't mind waiting for you to figure out what you want to do. They don't get irritated or annoyed very quickly. They will let you move at your speed, just happy to be in your company.

 

FAST-ACTION STEPS

 

a) Look at the list of habits above. Which ones do you think you already possess? Write these down.

 

b) Looking at the same list of habits, which ones do you lack? Write these down.

 

c) Finally, look at the list of habits you lack. Develop a plan to foster this habit in your life.

 

FURTHER READING

 

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TIPS REPORT 32: STOP FEELING GUILTY ABOUT SELF-CARE

 This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested readings for those who are looking for even more information. 

This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

Amazingly, one of the things that we typically feel guilty about is taking care of our own needs. It feels downright selfish to focus on yourself when there is so much you could be doing for others. While compassion, empathy, and kindness are wonderful qualities, we have to direct a little of that towards ourselves as well. If you have ever felt guilty about self-care, then you should consider these nine facts.

 

1. Self-Care Isn't an Indulgence

Taking care of your own needs isn't some frivolous act of selfishness. It is vitally important to your well-being. If you aren't taking care of yourself, you are risking health issues - both physical and mental.

 

2. Other People Practice Self-Care

Many people don't have any hang-ups about practicing self-care. Many of the people in your life have no qualms about taking care of themselves. If other people have no problem putting their own needs first, why shouldn't you? If you don't look after yourself, who will?

 

3. Helping Yourself, Helps Others

If you want to take care of anyone else, you need to meet your needs. The happier and healthier you are, the more capable you will be of helping the people you love. There is a reason that flight attendants tell you to put your mask on before helping others.

 

4. Your Loved Ones Want You To Take Care of Yourself

No one is going to begrudge you focusing on your self-care. Well, no one that matters anyway. Your closest loved ones will want the best for you, which includes practicing self-care. When you ignore your self-care, you are ignoring the wishes of your closest friends and family.

 

5. Get Comfortable With the Word "No"

It can be hard to say no, but you should strive to get used to it. People feel guilty when they say no, but quite often, that is the best answer. Setting boundaries on your time and energy isn't a bad thing. On top of that, you don't have to explain yourself - "no" is a full sentence.

 

6. Self-Care is Vital to Your Goals

Do you have any goals or dreams you aspire to achieve? If you do, then you are doing a disservice to yourself when you avoid self-care. It is much easier to reach your goals when you are attacking them healthy and happy.

 

7. Self-Care is About Self-Respect

Do you respect yourself? If you answered yes, but have been ignoring your self-care, then you are lying to yourself. You can't possibly respect yourself if you don't honor your own needs. If you respect yourself, then you should know you are worthy of self-care.

 

8. Self-Care Protects You

Proper self-care protects you from many different things. Self-care helps protect your health, energy, mind, time, and boundaries. Self-care is one of the best time investments you can make to protect yourself from future harm(s).

 

9. You Deserve It

There isn't a better reason for you to stop feeling guilty about self-care than the fact that you deserve it. Life is tough. We are all on a journey. It makes sense that we take some time to take care of ourselves. You deserve to enjoy the moments you can.

 

FAST-ACTION STEPS

 

a) Think about any aspects of self-care that you might be overlooking. Focus on things like your mental, physical and spiritual health. Are you struggling with any area?

 

b) Once you have found an area of your self-care you are neglecting (or want to expand upon), brainstorm a few ways you could address it.

 

c) Choose one small action you can take right now as your first step to addressing your area of need. Take it!

 

FURTHER READING

 

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TIPS REPORT 31: HOW TO GET GOOD ADVICE

 This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested readings for those who are looking for even more information. 

This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

Everyone needs good advice, now and then. No matter how independent we think we are, there comes a time when we need to call on someone else's opinion. The problem is, not all advice is equal. As often as we get good advice, we receive bad advice. If you want to make sure that you are getting good advice, here are nine tips that will help.

 

1. Figure Out What Advice You Need

You can't get good advice if you don't first admit you need it. Figure out what you need advice about. Focus on things like big decisions you need to make or areas of your life you are struggling. It's important to know what kind of advice you need, so you can narrow down where to look for it.

 

2. Find Someone Who Has "Been There Before"

A great way to get good advice is to find people who have accomplished what you want to accomplish. For example, if you want advice on what type of law you'd like to practice, it makes sense to find some current lawyers to chat with.

 

3. Reach Out to Your Most Trusted Friends

Friends and family are great places to look for good advice. The main benefit here is that you will know their expertise. The other benefit is that a loved one will do their best to give you good advice because they have your best interests at heart.

 

4. Make Sure Your Target Wants to Give Advice

Be wary if you approach someone who doesn't seem comfortable giving you advice. If they are annoyed by your request or don't want to share their expertise, you might end up getting bad advice. They might not even do it on purpose. A person who doesn't want to give advice might say whatever is on their mind to get rid of you.

 

5. Consider People's Potential Biases

When you are seeking good advice, it is important to consider any biases the advice-giver may have. A perfect example is getting relationship advice from someone who just got out of a bad one. They might have your best interests in heart but can't separate the bitterness of their situation from their advice.

 

6. Ask More Than One Person

There is nothing wrong with getting more than one person's advice. After all, if a doctor gave you a diagnosis you were concerned about, it's natural to ask for a second opinion. Sometimes you will find the best solution when you take bits and parts from everyone's advice.

 

7. Take Advantage of Your Current Resources

Depending on where you are in life, you might have some helpful resources you can reach out to ask for advice. In school, you might have a favorite teacher or guidance counselor. Your work might offer you a chance for mentorship. If you go to a gym, you might have access to a personal trainer.

 

8. Do Your Own Online Search

If you don't have anyone to reach out to, you can find a lot of great information with a Google search. The problem is, you need to figure out what to trust. It would help if you learned the Hierarchy of Evidence. Without boring detail - clinical research trials are near the top, and random memes from Facebook are at the bottom.

 

9. Be Willing to Offer Your Own Good Advice

This point might seem like a strange addition. After all, you want to get advice, not give it. However, giving good advice is a great way to encourage others to help you when you are in need. The more people you give good advice to, the more people who will be willing to give you the best advice possible.

 

FAST-ACTION STEPS

 

a) Where could you use some good advice in your life? Make a list of everything you could use some advice about.

 

b) Look at your list, and think about where to get the advice you need. Do you know anyone with expertise in these areas? Match up the advice you need with people already in your life.

 

c) Do your own search. If you had any areas of advice that didn't match up with someone in your life, do some online searching for your own answers.

 

FURTHER READING

 

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TIPS REPORT 30: STAYING OPTIMISTIC WHEN BUSINESS IS SLOW

 This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested readings for those who are looking for even more information. 

This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

Whether you run your own business or work for someone else's, it can be a stressful time when sales are down. When revenue slows down, it can affect everyone's morale. The head office of a struggling business can be a depressing place to be. If you run your own business, it can be even grimmer. You might not have the money to float your struggling business for that long. However, the reality is most businesses will ebb and flow. If you want to learn how to stay positive when it ebbs, check out these nine tips.

 

1. Reflect on Past Lulls

Often our fears of what could happen are significantly worse than what really happens. You have likely dealt with business slowing down before. Reflect on those times, and appreciate the fact that you are still here.

 

2. Is The Reason Outside of Your Control?

While we don't always know what is causing our business to slow down, there are sometimes obvious issues that we can't control. Things like crazy weather, a struggling economy, or - I dunno - a worldwide pandemic might be hurting your business. If this is the case, focus on the fact you aren't doing anything wrong. Accept that you can't control everything.

 

3. Brush Up on Your Skills

If business is slow, and you want to stop obsessing over it, why not brush up on your skills? When you spend time improving yourself, you will think less about your business. You will also build self-confidence that can help keep you positive.

 

4. Examine Your Processes and Systems

When business slows down, you might find yourself with a bit more free time. This is a great time to examine the processes and systems of your business (or workflow). You can use the extra time to dial in your systems so that you are even more efficient when business picks up.

 

5. Is It Time to Innovate?

Sometimes business slows down because it has become stale. If this is the case, you can help stay positive by innovating. If you own a business, you could develop a new product or service to offer. If you are an employee, you could try and figure out new unique ways to contribute.

 

6. Enjoy Some Leisure Time

Often we get so lost in our business or job that we don't take enough time for ourselves. If things are slowing down at work, maybe it is time you enjoyed some of your favorite leisure activities. It is easier to stay positive when you are focused on self-care.

 

7. Learn From It

One of the best ways to stay positive when faced with any obstacle is to try and glean a lesson from it. What can you learn about business slowing down? Is there any takeaway that will help both you and the business to grow?

 

8. Keep Working

Just because your business is slowing down doesn't mean you give up. Keep up the good work. Something got you this far, after all. You will feel much more positive if you continue to work instead of hiding your head in the sand.

 

9. Spend Time With the People You Love

If business slowing down allows you to spend more time with your loved ones - that is a win. You will find it much easier to stay positive if you surround yourself with supportive people cheering for your success.

 

FAST-ACTION STEPS

 

a) Reflect on a past time that business was slow or you were worried about your job. How did things work out in the long term?

 

b) Reach out to someone who has dealt with a business failing or a change in their career. Ask them for advice. Ask them how things worked out in the end.

 

c) Expect the best, but plan for the worst. What would your first three steps be if your business failed or you lost your job?

 

FURTHER READING

 

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TIPS REPORT 29: DEALING WITH REJECTION

 This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested readings for those who are looking for even more information. 

This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

To live a life without rejection would be a truly blessed existence. Unfortunately, none of us get through our lives without the bitter taste of rejection crossing our lips at least once or twice. Whether it's losing out on a job you applied for or getting dumped by the love of our lives, rejection hurts. We can't let rejection define us, though. If you want to learn how to deal with rejection, try these nine tips.

 

1. Understand Why It Hurts

Firstly, it's important to make sure that you realize rejection hurts us all. There is nothing wrong with feeling its sting. In our ancient history, we relied on social groups for our survival. You aren't "too sensitive" when you feel rejected. You are tapping into your baked-in survival instincts.

 

2. Accept That You Are Hurt

Don't suppress or ignore your feelings. Don't play the role of emotionally distant tough guy and deny how hurt you feel. Mentally strong people acknowledge their feelings, even if they are embarrassed or disappointed.

 

3. Don't Overate What You're Missing

Once we have been rejected, it is easy for us to build up an idealized version of whatever (or whoever) rejected us. That job you missed out on isn't your only chance. That romantic interest you lost wasn't your only soulmate.

 

4. Treat Yourself With Compassion

A University of Arizona study discovered that divorced people who practiced self-compassion reported fewer negative thoughts about their divorce. It also helped people stay positive and avoid getting lost in dark thoughts.

 

5. Don't Let Rejection Define You

Your rejection doesn't define you. If you are mentally strong - or want to be - you can't make wide sweeping generalizations about yourself the rejected. You can't let yourself feel like you aren't worthy of anyone or anything because of a few rejections.

 

6. Learn a Lesson

Whoever you face rejection, make sure you learn a lesson from it. If you miss out on that promotion you wanted, figure out what you need to work on to be ready for your next opportunity.

 

7. Spend Time with People You Love

The pain of rejection can be emotionally destructive. One of the best things you can do to get over it is to spend time with the people who love you. You will worry less about rejection when you are closed to the people you care about the most.

 

8. Use it as Fuel

Instead of letting rejection stall your progress, why not use it as fuel? The sting of rejection could be just what you need to motivate yourself. You don't want to feel that pain again, so work your hardest to avoid it.

 

9. Brush Yourself Off and Try Again

This is all you can do. It's easy to wallow in rejection and let it get you down, but you can't let it keep you down for too long. Everyone has to deal with rejection. And, while we can't let rejection define us, how we bounce back from it just might.

 

FAST-ACTION STEPS

 

a) Reflect on your most recent feelings of rejection. How did it make you feel? What feelings did it stir up within? Are you over it?

 

b) Did you learn anything from this rejection? Did you learn anything about yourself? Is there any area of your life that you could improve to avoid future rejection?

 

c) How will you avoid similar rejection in the future? What are a few ways you could avoid a similar rejection in the future?

 

FURTHER READING

 

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TIPS REPORT 28: SLOWING DOWN IN A FAST-PACED WORLD

 This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested readings for those who are looking for even more information. 

This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

We live in a fast-paced world that seems to be getting faster each year. While technology has helped us accomplish some things more efficiently, it certainly hasn't slowed our pace down. It's quite the opposite. Many people enjoy this fast-paced, action-packed world, but even the most ardent supporters could benefit from slowing down once in a while. It's not until we slow down that we can notice just how far we have come. If you think you would benefit from slowing down in life, consider these nine tips.

 

1. Slowing Down is a Choice

It would help if you acknowledged that slowing down is a choice. Recognizing this is important because it helps you realize that you don't have to bounce along at breakneck speed with the rest of the world. You have the control to step back and slow down. It's your choice to make.

 

2. Say "No" A Lot More

The best way to slow down is to say "no" more often. You don't always have to do that favor or take on extra responsibilities. If you don't have the time, don't be afraid to say no to other people's demands for your time.

 

3. Do Less

You can accomplish just as much as you currently are by doing less if you make sure you spend most of your active time on the things that matter most. Focus on the things in your life that you really need to do, and let go (or outsource) the rest.

 

4. Disconnect

Smartphones and wireless internet are both life-changing developments in our world. Of course, that doesn't mean you have to be using them 24 hours a day. Don't be afraid to put your phone or device down, and immerse yourself in the world directly in front of you.

 

5. Make More Time for Nature

Spending time in nature is one of the best ways to ground yourself. Not all of us have access to remote mountain trails, but even a stroll in your local park can do wonders. Regularly spending time in the great outdoors is a wonderful way to slow down.

 

6. Find Simple Pleasures

So many of us seem to spend our time mindlessly working while waiting for the big events in our life. Not everything you celebrate or enjoy needs to be a big event, though. Learn to take more pleasure in the small daily things. Don't choke back your coffee as fast as possible in the morning; sit down and truly savor it.

 

7. Focus on Your Breathing

When is the last time you just sat there and focused on your breathing? This might not seem groundbreaking, but it's a powerful activity that helps ground you at the moment. If you ever feel like things are racing and spinning around you out of your control, take some time to clear your mind and focus on your breathing.

 

8. Stick to Single-Tasking

Focusing on one task at a time is a great way to slow your pace down. Instead of rushing to finish multiple tasks, you can take your time and do one well. An added benefit is that single-tasking is often more efficient than multi-tasking anyways.

 

9. Who Are You Competing With?

What imaginary race are you running, and who are your competitors? So often, our fast pace is in response to us competing with a sibling, coworker, neighbor, or that guy we all hated in high school. If you commit to worrying less about other people and stop comparing yourself, you will naturally slow your pace.

 

FAST-ACTION STEPS

 

a) Practice saying no. The next time someone asks you to do something you don't have time for, say no. Don't worry about explaining why.

 

b) Audit your day. Take a day (or more) to track everything that you do. Which tasks are just time-wasters? Are there any that you could outsource?

 

c) Find more simple pleasures. Find a new hobby or pastime that you can regularly enjoy.

 

FURTHER READING

 

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