TIPS REPORT 16: HOW TO BE LESS AWKWARD

 

This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested reading for those who are looking for even more information.

This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

 

TOP TIPS

Do you ever feel a little bit awkward? If so, don't worry - you are far from alone. Many people feel a bit socially awkward in certain situations. If you feel awkward now and then, it might be as simple as not picking up on social cues or misunderstanding body language. Whatever the reason, the following nine tips can help you address that awkward feeling once and for all.

 

1. Get Out of Your Head

This tip is easier said than done, but you need to get out of your head. If you are constantly worried about being awkward, you likely will be. If you find your mind is spiraling with worry and self-doubt, you will struggle in social situations. Try to center yourself, and engage in social situations with an open mind.

 

2. Learn More About Social Norms

A lot of awkwardness comes down to not knowing social norms. You might not have learned these social cues growing up, so it doesn't hurt to brush up on them. There is no shortage of information on the internet to help you learn more about societal norms and how to react to them.

 

3. Keep Your Phone Handy

Your phone can be your savior in awkward situations. For example, I hate elevator small-talk, so I make sure I am immersed in my phone when someone gets on. You don't want to be constantly on your phone in social situations, but feel free to use it if it will defuse an awkward situation.

 

4. Don't Show Up Late

Showing up on time or early to social engagements has two main benefits. First, it gives you time to get used to your surroundings. More importantly, when you show up late, all eyes will be on you, which will certainly exacerbate your awkwardness.

 

5. Put Yourself Out There

If you feel awkward in social situations, you aren't doing yourself any favors by avoiding them. You need to embrace social engagements as often as you feel comfortable doing so. The more you put yourself out there, the easier it will be to fit in.

 

6. Invite a Close Friend Out With You

Having a close friend with you is a great way to battle your awkwardness. This is especially true if you bring along one of your friends who is socially adept. You can learn from them by mirroring their behavior. Also, it's nice to have someone trusted you could turn to if things start getting a bit awkward.

 

7. Develop Your Confidence

This is another tip that is a bit easier said than done. However, there are ways you can build up your confidence, and you must do so. A lot of awkwardness is born from a lack of confidence. If you are more confident, you will feel more prepared and less awkward in social situations.

 

8. Ask More Questions

If you are in a conversation that seems to be lagging a bit and bordering on awkwardness, try to ask more questions. Focus on open-ended questions that keep the other person talking. You'll quickly learn that you can easily avoid awkwardness by giving certain people a chance to talk about themselves.

 

9. Worry Less About Others

A lot of our awkwardness is born out of worry about what others will think of us. We worry that they will think we are weird, stupid, or annoying if we say something. The reality is, most people aren't that interested in others, to begin with. Worrying about other people's opinions will do nothing but contribute to your awkwardness.

 

ACTIONABLE STEPS

 

a) Think of a couple of go-to stories. A great way to deal with awkwardness is to prepare in advance. Having a couple of interesting stories in your back pocket will help you feel better.

 

b) Do you have an event or social gathering coming up? Think of a friend that you could bring along to make things go a bit smoother.

 

c) Brush up on social norms, cues, or body language. A quick Google search should bring up thousands of free resources.

 

FURTHER READING

 

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TIPS REPORT 15: HOW TO TELL SOMEONE IS LYING

 

This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested reading for those who are looking for even more information. 

This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

You might not like to admit it, but you have likely been lied to hundreds of times in your life. For the most part, these lies are usually small, inconsequential comments that don't have much of an impact on your life. However, sometimes these lies hurt or seriously mislead us. Wouldn't it be nice to be able to spot a lie before it affected your life? Below are nine ways that you can stop a lie before it negatively impacts your life.

 

1. They Have a History of Dishonesty

If you think someone is lying to you, the first thing you should consider is your history with them. Have they lied to you before? Are they typically dishonest? This might not identify them as a liar outright, but it is a red flag to consider.

 

2. Establish a Baseline

One of the biggest indicators someone is lying is when they start acting differently than usual. For example, research shows that lack of eye contact on its own isn't an indicator of deceit, but if the person normally meets your gaze, then it may be. Watch for out-of-character actions.

 

3. They Use Hand Gestures After They Speak

Many of us use hand gestures as we talk or before we talk, but professionals have noticed that liars tend to make their hand gestures after they have spoken. It is almost as if keeping up with the lie in their head slows down their hand gestures.

 

4. They are Rocking Back and Forth or Fidgeting

If you find that someone is fidgeting back and forth a lot, then they may be lying. Keep in mind there are plenty of reasons a person may be fidgety, including medical issues and shyness. However, if the fidgetiness is out of character, that's a red flag.

 

5. They Are Overly Vague

A sign someone might be dishonest is if the story they are feeding you is super vague and avoiding any kind of detail. They might be glossing over important details or ignoring others altogether. This vagueness is certainly something to keep an eye out for.

 

6. They Repeat Questions Before Answering Them

This is a classic technique for a liar to buy some more time before they answer. You have likely dealt with this before. Have you ever been part of a conversation like: "Where were you last night?" "Where was I last night?" That last question is likely someone trying to buy some time to think about an answer.

 

7. What Does Their Smile Say?

A fake smile is often a good indication that someone is lying to you. If they are faking the smile, what else are they dishonest about? A good way to spot a fake smile is if the lips are smiling, but it doesn't reach the rest of their face. A genuine smile reaches a person's eyes and brows.

 

8. Ask Them a Lot of Questions

Remember we mentioned that liar's stories are often vague? This is because they don't want to keep track of the details. Don't give them a chance. If you think someone is lying to you, ask them questions, and keep asking them. You are likely to catch them red-handed when they get tripped up and forget one of their details.

 

9. Are They Speaking in a Higher-Pitched Voice?

One potential sign someone is lying is if their voice is higher-pitched than usual. This is easier to notice in someone you already know. If you know they don't usually talk in a high-pitched voice but are all of a sudden; then you might be listening to a liar.

 

ACTIONABLE STEPS

 

a) Reflect on if there are any situations in your life where someone might be lying to you. Don't worry about small lies. Try to think about something more serious.

 

b) Once you have chosen the potential lie, write down reasons it may be a lie. Then consider some reasons why it might not be a lie. Consider each side carefully.

 

c) After this, if you feel confident you are being lied to, confront the person. Remember to keep the above nine tips in mind when you do so.

 

FURTHER READING

 

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TIPS REPORT 14: SOCIAL SKILLS FOR SUCCESS

 

This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested reading for those who are looking for even more information. 

This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

No matter how introverted or isolated you may feel at times, we all live in a "society." Brushing up on our social skills is vital to our success. Our era's social and technological changes have made social skills an absolute necessity, especially in our careers. There have been studies done to try and prove this point. Research from Greece has shown how important employers and colleagues find social skills.

If you want to brush up on your social skills, focus on these nine for ultimate success.

 

1. Empathy

Essentially, empathy is the ability to understand other people and what they are feeling. Empathy is an important skill for anyone who deals with any clients. Knowing what makes people tick can also help you better navigate the corporate world as well.

 

2. Communication

Communication is a vital skill when it comes to success. You could be the smartest person in the world, but if you can't effectively communicate your ideas, then no one will ever know. An important part of communication is listening, as well, so make sure you practice your active listening skills.

 

3. Leadership

Even if you aren't in a leadership position, this is an important social skill to have. You never know when you will be called upon to take up some sort of leadership role. Whether you work for yourself or others, you will often find yourself in a position to manage others.

 

4. Adaptability

This skill could have easily been top of the list, especially in our fast-changing world. When it comes to social skills, adaptability means you can fit in seamlessly. If you need to take on a leadership role, you can handle it. But, if you need to play the role of worker-bee, you can handle that as well. You can accept the role needed, and you can thrive working with all sorts of people.

 

5. Body Language

You can say a lot without ever opening your mouth. It is important to learn about body language because it is a big part of any first impression you make. Unchecked body language can lead to misunderstandings and reflect poorly on your attitude. Conversely, you can use body language to your advantage by projecting confidence.

 

6. Positivity

Positivity might not seem like a "social" skill initially, but it can certainly help your social interactions. Being positive will attract people and helps to foster an overall enjoyable social experience. Just think about it; would you rather spend time with positive or negative people?

 

7. Conflict Resolution

No matter what your career or business is, you will deal with conflict. Conflict is simply a part of business, and more aptly, life. Being able to navigate these conflicts and diffuse them will make a world of difference in your day-to-day life and career.

 

8. Patience

Most of the time, our impatience runs thin because of other people. Maybe they are late, or you are waiting on a response, or you need them to finish something so you can move on with your work. Fostering patience in these scenarios is important. You don't want to be a pushover, but you need to manage your expectations. If not, you will stress out yourself and your team.

 

9. Affability

What is the point of working on your social skills if people don't want to be around you? Affability is just being friendly or easy to talk to. This skill is vital for just about all of your social interactions. Being the type of person people want to spend time with can only help your journey towards success.

 

ACTIONABLE STEPS

 

a) Take a good look at the list we provided and try to figure out which of these social skills you need to work on the most.

 

b) Once you identify the social skill you need to work on, brainstorm a list of ways that you can acquire or strengthen this skill.

 

c) Choose one way to strengthen your chosen skill from the list your brainstormed. Focus on a simple step you can take ASAP. Now go ahead and take it!

 

FURTHER READING

 

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TIPS REPORT 13: NINE BEST THINGS TO DO AT HOME ALONE

This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested reading for those who are looking for even more information. 

This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

With the way things are going these days, a lot of us find ourselves spending more time alone than ever before. While some introverts may enjoy this new-founded alone time, other people are really struggling. One of the best ways to cope with these feelings of isolation and loneliness is to discover things you can do at home alone. Below you will find a list of 9 activities you can embrace when home alone.

 

1. Pamper Yourself with a Spa Day

Not every activity you do has to be directly productive. In fact, one of the most productive steps you can take is to spoil yourself. Set some mood lighting, put on some soothing music, and take a nice luxurious bath. If that's not your thing, find another way to pamper yourself.

 

2. Enjoy Your Favorite Treat

While you might not want to over-indulge in your favorite treats, there is nothing wrong with enjoying yourself once in a while. A great way to brighten a dark day is to spoil yourself with your favorite food.

 

3. Dance Like No One is Looking

Those of us who share our dance steps with Elaine from Seinfeld might not love breaking out our moves on a crowded dance floor. When you are home alone, though, no one can see or judge you. Crank your favorite tunes, and let loose with your best dance moves.

 

4. Reflect on Your Life

Alone time is one of the best times for you to sit back and reflect on your life. You can think about what's working and what isn't. You can consider the things you like versus things you'd like to improve. Writing this in a journal is a wonderful habit to get into while spending some alone time at home.

 

5. Do a Deep Clean

Cleaning isn't exactly the most enjoyable task, but the feeling of sitting in your freshly cleaned space is wonderful. When you are home alone, you will find it's much easier to clean because no one is getting in your way or instantly undoing the hard work you have just done.

 

6. Read a Book

Reading a book, you have meant to read for a while is the perfect way to spend some alone time. You can give the book your full attention and escape into its pages. Don't get bogged down by a book you don't enjoy, though. If you aren't captivated early, consider choosing something else.

 

7. Practice or Learn a New Skill

Do you have any new skills you want to learn? II have heard of more people taking up things like baking and cross stitch in the past year than ever before. Are there any similar hobbies you'd like to start? What about an old hobby that you haven't had time for? Maybe it is time to pick it back up!

 

8. Do Something You've Been Putting Off

This might sound like a nightmare, but you likely have plenty of tasks around the house that you've been putting off. Spending your alone time addressing at least one of those tasks is sure to pay off in the satisfaction of accomplishment.

 

9. Make a Plan

If you want to lean into something more productive, why not spend some time plotting your next moves? Use your alone time to set some new goals, envision your future, and help figure out your next few steps. Every second you put into goal-setting and planning will be paid back in the long run.

 

ACTIONABLE STEPS

 

a) Brainstorm a List - Think of as many ways as possible to spoil or pamper yourself. There are no wrong answers here.

 

b) Pick a Book - Choose a book that interests you. This can be a classic you've always wanted to read, or something simpler that caught your attention.

 

c) Do It! - Don't wallow in your solitude any longer. Embrace it. Get up and do something for yourself, and only yourself, right now!

 

FURTHER READING

 

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TIPS REPORT 12: HOW TO SPEAK UP

This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested reading for those who are looking for even more information. ©

 

This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you are desperate to jump in and say your piece, but instead, you stew in silence? If you can relate to this, you might have trouble speaking up. This is a serious issue. If you aren't willing or able to speak up for yourself, rest assured that no one else will either. No concerns, issues, questions, or solutions you might have in your head will ever materialize if you can't speak up at the right time. If you'd like to be the type of person who speaks up when their best interests are at stake, please consider these nine tips.

 

1. Know What You Stand For

When you take the time to figure out what matters to you, you will be more likely to speak up on those interests. Knowing what's important is a good way to figure out when you should speak up versus staying quiet.

 

2. Be Ready

If you struggle speaking up, trying to wing it at the moment is going to be intimidating. Make sure you plan and prepare yourself in advance whenever possible. If you have a meeting you know you want to bring something up, then have all your talking points ready.

 

3. Start Small

One of the only ways to get over an inability to speak up is to start doing it. It might be too intimidating to start on a grand scale, so try and start small. An example of starting small would be speaking up in a one-on-one situation.

 

4. Write Down What You Want to Say

Some people are much better at writing their thoughts than verbally expressing them. While you can't hand in a paper during a big work meeting, having your thoughts written down already will give you time to practice your delivery.

 

5. Find An Early Opening

The longer you sit in silence, the harder it will be for you to speak up. You will give your mind too much time to create a bunch of excuses why you shouldn't. Also, finding an early opening ensures you have the time to get your point across.

 

6. Recognize It's Hard but Worthwhile

It doesn't help for you to pretend speaking up is easy. Acknowledge that it will be a challenge, but realize it will be worth it. Research into "Realistic Optimism" has shown that people are more likely to follow through if they expect a task to be challenging. https://hbr.org/2011/05/be-an-optimist-without-being-a

 

7. Your Voice Deserves to Be Heard

You have a unique voice, outlook ad understanding of things. Your thoughts and opinions are important and valuable. If you can't accept and believe this, you will never be able to speak up for yourself.

 

8. Stop Worrying About Others' Thoughts

It's perfectly fine to consider other people's feelings before you speak. However, it's important not to go overboard. Don't worry about everyone else agreeing with you or looking stupid. If you have something important to say, then say it.

 

9. Learn the Art of Diplomacy

Sometimes it's best to be as direct and blunt as possible. Other times, it can help you to be a bit more diplomatic. The less aggressive you have to be, the easier you will find it to speak up for yourself.

 

ACTIONABLE STEPS

 

a) Make a list of times where you didn't speak out and you should have. Note how each time may have negatively impacted you.

 

b) Think about an important issue you are dealing with, and devise a way to speak up about it.

 

c) The next time you feel the urge to speak up about something, just jump right in and do it. It could be as simple as correcting a server who misheard your order.

 

FURTHER READING

 

Affiliate links:

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TIPS REPORT 11: SPRING-CLEAN YOUR LIFE

 

This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested reading for those who are looking for even more information. ©

This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

When you think of spring-cleaning, you probably think of the time of year where you go all out cleaning up your house. You know the time you move the fridge and sweep out all the nooks and crevices. What if you took that same idea, but instead of cleaning your physical surroundings, you tidied up your life? If you don't quite understand what that means, here are nine examples that can get you started.

 

1. Take Stock

Before you start to spring-clean your life, you should take careful stock of how you are currently doing. Do you have goals? How are they going? Are there any areas of your life you'd like to change up? Taking stock of where you are at will help you direct your energy where it's needed.

 

2. Clean Up Your Relationships

Do you have any toxic relationships? Maybe it is time to part ways with these people. If the people in your life don't cheer you up, lift you up or build you up, why are they in your life anyway?

 

3. Tidy Up Your Habits

It might be time to clean up those bad habits of yours. Bad habits add up over time and cost you in the long run. If you feel like you already do a good job of that, focus on building some new positive habits.

 

4. Clear Your Mind

We all got a lot going on in our heads. Maybe you should take some time to clean things up a bit. Developing a daily meditation practice is a great way to clear your mind. You might also try journaling. Getting those thoughts spinning around in your head onto paper can make a world of difference.

 

5. Unplug

Technology is great, but sometimes we need to unplug and live in the moment. Don't be afraid to prune some of our social media accounts. Aim to spend less time on your devices and more time just taking in the world around you.

 

6. Refresh Your Fitness Routine

Has your fitness routine got boring or stale? Do you even have a fitness routine? Why not shake things up? Spring-cleaning is all about out with old and in with the new. Find a new exercise, sport, or activity that gets you excited, and try to fit it into your daily routine.

 

7. Sort Your Diet

A great way to tidy up your life is to clean up your diet a bit. Think about adding more natural whole foods and cut down on your guilty pleasures. Find a healthy way of eating that you can sustain.

 

8. Organize Your Workspace

This is almost real spring-cleaning! Organizing your workspace is a great way to boost your productivity and get more excited about working in general. Reorganizing is less about cleaning and more about making sure every item has its space and every space has a purpose.

 

9. Rearrange Your Goals

For the vast majority of people, some of their goals work out, and some don't. This is why it's important to adjust your goals once in a while. Figure out what is working, and double down on that. Find out what isn't working, and figure out why. Make it a regular practice to check in on your goals.

 

ACTIONABLE STEPS

 

a) Reflect on the past year of your life. Make a list of things that worked and another list of things that didn't. This will help you direct your "cleaning" efforts.

 

b) Tidy up your social media by unfollowing the people who constantly annoy or push your buttons. Think about who matters to you, and unfollow those that don't.

 

c) Schedule your spring-cleaning time into your calendar. Choose a few days over the upcoming weeks to focus solely on tidying up your life.

 

FURTHER READING

 

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TIPS REPORT 10: STOP MAKING THE SAME MISTAKES

 

This report includes nine powerful tips and three actionable steps you can take right away. It also includes a list of suggested reading for those who are looking for even more information. ©

 This article is from a Series of 52 tips Report on the subject of self improvement. If you want to receive a file with all 52 Reports at once, you can subscribe to my e-mail list.

TOP TIPS

There is nothing wrong with making mistakes. After all, making mistakes is one of the key ways we learn, grow and build all sorts of important qualities like persistence and resilience. Mistakes become a problem when we keep repeating the same ones. When we continually repeat the same mistake, we aren't learning anything from it. Worst yet, repeating the same mistakes stalls any positive progress we may be making in life. If this sounds familiar, and you are ready to stop making the same mistakes, consider these nine tips.

 

1. Identify the Mistakes You Repeat

You can't take action on your mistakes until you identify and acknowledge them. Strive to be more aware of the present moment. If you make a mistake, ask yourself if this is something you keep doing. Once you have an idea of the mistakes you keep making, you can correct them.

 

2. Why Does This Keep Happening?

Once you have singled out a mistake (or more) that you keep repeating, ask yourself why this keeps happening. Getting to the root cause of why you are repeatedly making the same mistake is important because it allows you to address the underlying cause.

 

3. How Do My Mistakes Harm Me?

A great way to avoid making the same mistakes again is to carefully consider how they are harming you. When you identify your mistakes' negative impact, you will naturally feel more motivated to stop them.

 

4. Learn a Lesson from Your Mistakes

A mistake isn't a problem if it teaches you a lesson. Make sure that you take a lesson from each mistake you make. When it comes to recurring mistakes, the lesson should be identifying ways to avoid making a mistake again.

 

5. Make a Plan

If you are struggling to avoid certain mistakes, make a plan of attack. Take the time to write down steps you can take to address the mistake. This simple act not only gives you a plan to take action on, but it also helps your subconscious recognize the mistake (hopefully) before it happens again.

 

6. Change Your Habits

If you keep doing the same things, you are going to keep making the same mistakes. It might be time for you to switch things up a bit. By building positive habits (or avoiding negative ones), you change the way you do things. Ideally, this means you will get different results, which may be enough to avoid certain recurring mistakes.

 

7. Address Your Weaknesses

Once you have identified your recurring mistakes, check to see if they are caused in part by any weaknesses you have. If so, consider taking the steps needed to address those weaknesses. If you can't address a weakness on your own, consider asking a close friend for help.

 

8. Apologies Must Mean Something

If you repeatedly make the type of mistakes you have to apologize for, remember that an apology has to mean something. Take time to consider how you may have harmed someone else, and when you apologize, do it thoughtfully and sincerely. When you recognize the severity of your mistakes, it's easier to avoid them.

 

9. Surround Yourself with Honest Friends

A great way to break the cycle of repeated mistakes is to have friends that aren't scared to tell you how it is. When you have loved ones that feel comfortable calling you out, it helps you avoid making the same mistakes repeatedly. They will tell you the things that you might not want to admit to yourself.

 

ACTIONABLE STEPS

 

a) Take 20-30 minutes to brainstorm a list of mistakes that you repeatedly make.

 

b) Identify 2-3 of these mistakes that you'd like to stop making. To begin, choose the ones you feel are easiest to address.

 

c) Write out an action plan to deal with each of the mistakes you just chose.

 

FURTHER READING

 

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