Saturday, December 30, 2023

I want a girlfriend.

 


I want a girlfriend.

Today, I am going to write about an experience I had with an awesome student. His roommates had told me that he was the most studious among them, but like most of my Chinese students, he was a bit shy. I completely understand that because I used to be a shy person too. That's not a bad trait, but I have to say that shyness should not get in the way of your accomplishments, whether it's making new friends, finding a girlfriend, acing a job interview, or anything that requires people skills. People skills are very desirable and can benefit you in your personal and professional life. The following picture is an interesting point from the book "Captivate" by Vanessa V. Edwards.

Fortunately, my micro camera was on, and I was able to record our little experiment, which consisted of making new friends that night. While having dinner with some Chinese students, we talked about many things, including how to find a girlfriend. I can tell you that it can be very intimidating if you are a shy person, like I was before. But today, it's the easiest thing in the world for me to approach strangers and start a conversation, and very often, we exchange WeChat contacts and become friends. Finding a girlfriend can become an easy and natural process if you have no problem chatting with girls. So, I did not propose to my Chinese friend that we would find him a girlfriend. Instead, I suggested we start a process that will make him more confident, increase his people skills, and help him overcome his shyness.

I found out that most university students don't make many friends while in university. They usually become friends with their roommates and some of their classmates, and that's usually it. The question I want you to consider is: "Where in the world will you have the same opportunity that you have right now in university?" Please note that most people on campus are at the same age, are university students themselves, and are basically at the same level intellectually and financially. They also have a good perspective on life, as they will have a university degree in a few years (not everyone has that). The most important aspect I want to stress is that all these people are together in one place for a few years. What a wonderful opportunity to meet people and make new friends, and perhaps even meet the girl you will marry in the future. The odds are in your favor here and now during your university years. After this, you will likely not be in a place where it will be so easy to meet new people like now.

So, we dismissed his roommates, grabbed a cup of juice, and went about walking around the canteen, looking for a table to sit together with some girls. After we decided on one table with two cute girls, I took the lead and approached them, as I do practically every day. After we sat with them, my Chinese friend took the lead and started chatting with the girls. Of course, he was doing much better than me because I don't speak Chinese. After a few minutes, we asked the girls if we could have their WeChat and took pictures together. It was fun, and we just made new friends.

This is not the actual picture of todays little challenge, but for me that is what I do most the time, new friends while eating.

That experience was nice. If it had not been nice because the girls did not want to sit with us, I would say please do not let rejection affect you so much that you would stop making friends. It will happen eventually, but you should keep the process going. In my experience, most people are nice, and they will say yes to you. The usual outcome is to make a new friend, and if someone says no to me, I usually go to the next table and so on until I find someone who says yes.

Let's go back to the topic of finding a girlfriend. So this is a process who will get him where he wants to be. What He have started and keep pushing himself out of his comfort zone will definitely improve him and his people skills. Making new friends and improving people skills can open up new opportunities for personal and professional growth, and you never know who you might meet along the way. So, take advantage of the wonderful opportunities that university provides, and don't let shyness or fear hold you back. Keep approaching new people, striking up conversations, and building your network. With time and practice, you will become more confident, and making new friends will become second nature to you. 

To conclude this article, I want to extend my congratulations to my friend who took up the challenge of approaching a group of girls with me to make new friends. It takes a lot of courage to step out of your comfort zone like that, especially for the first time. However, I can assure you that it becomes easier with practice. The more you put yourself out there, the more comfortable you will become.

In fact, this is such great advice that I'm passing it on to my own kids: make as many friends as possible, including girls. Having more options is always better than having no options at all. This is what we call networking. By getting to know more people, you'll have a more fulfilling life, and it will become easier to find a life partner or even a job.

If you're interested, you can watch the YouTube recording of us chatting with the girls that I mentioned in this post. Additionally, I've included a related articles below that you might find helpful.

I wish you find this useful and Good luck on your journey!

1. She knows where she is going to.

2. Join our English Corner to Improve Your Language Skills and Make New Friends.

3. Networking is an essential part of building a successful career.

4. Dating During College Years.

5. Make the Most of Your Time in College.

6. Friends

7. The Benefits of Making Friends with OTHER Students from other courses.

Marcelo Gameiro

Article by Marcelo Gameiro

Published 22 Apr 2023

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